With 19 days left in DC, things seem to be coming to a close in a hurry. It's funny, how even when you think about something long enough to completely over-analyze it, change your mind several times, and then conclude the decision was right to begin with AND leave yourself enough time take care of details at a leisurely pace, it inevitably feels rushed in the end anyway. Definitely one of those, there isn't enough time but there is still plenty of time, things. I think it speaks to the degree that you want something to happen. That you are ready for a change.
And still, with only a month left in the US, I feel as though I have a lifetime left here. Everything feels... I don't want to say routine, but familiar. And I can't get myself to operate with any sense of urgancy. I used to attribute this to some extremely lazy phase I thought I was going through (which still may be true). Now though, I believe it to be more a reflection of how comfortable I've grown here in DC, especially with the people around me. While I'm still 100% committed to leaving (mentally... I know I'm monetarily committed), and to the experiences I think I'll find, I know once I get off the plane in Quito the regret will be all too real for the places, people, relationships, and life that I gave up.
I definitely used to, and to a large degree still am, a very analytical person. I like to know all the angles, and all the choices, before making even simple decisions. And while I can't say this is a very spontaneous decision, it feels good to make it more on gut and instinct than because it was logically a good choice.
Or maybe I'm just a little loopy from the vaccinations.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment